Minecraft

Minecraft is a Java based RPG/world creator/sandbox that will have your jaw hanging limply below your kneecaps.

There's a few modes but i'm going to focus on the main mode which is minecraft: Alpha, which yes, is still in Alpha.

For a game that's around a year old and is written in java, i'm

surprised I didn't year about it earlier.

Well the basic jist of the game is that you start a new game and the program generates a random map which you're then thrown unforgivingly into.

You have a few game hours to make a shelter and to get something to do during the night, unless you want to die while trying to slay one of four beasts of the land.

Spiders, skeletons, Zombies and creepers are all trying to stop you from perfecting the infinite landscape. you must mine for invaluable resources such as iron, coal and diamond, so that you can rid of these monsters and create a paradise. That is of course unless you play in peaceful

mode, where your health regenerates and there are no nasty monsters.

In addition to monsters there are four regular animals which you can farm for health giving products and other useful things; Cows, chickens, sheep and pigs are all part of the unforgiving yet,

beautiful landscape.

This games has neither the best graphics nor the best physics engine (actually it doesn't even have an engine) but it works well and has a fully supportive

community and an awesomely talented Coder behind it which quite honestly means the possibilities for this game are endless.

As far as the story goes, you can just make it up and as far as character design goes, well hell, you can make that up too. it take a bit of working out but in the end is worth it.

I still haven't mentioned the truly unique aspect of this game. Everything is made out of blocks which you can pick up and craft, smelt, place or just smash. The whole world it a mesh which you

can modify to your hearts content. obviously spawning from this a huge penis and breast structures, or maybe something more sophisticated like super mario?

Well this is a game you can really let your imagination run riot, which a mob full of people holding flaming touches.

For nine euro I would definitely recommend getting this. It's not quite done yet thought so

there's many more things to be added. You can play it in browser or you can download the game to your hard drive, but it only take a few kb (one of the plus sides for using java) so I would download if you can.

Dyson.

pro space gardening!

It's not out yet but I Beta like the cool guy I am!

October the ninth, a day that will leave many starved, a day that no one will sleep, a day that every one will be playing Dyson.

Dyson is a fresh new 'Indie' (independent) game that has the rule of 'give a little, gain a lot'.

Pretty much you get these seed things that I like to call clangers, because they clang, and an asteroid belt.
The aim of the gaim is to take over the asteroid belt in a fury of Clangs.

So you start each level with a tree on an asteroid and some seeds.
The longer you have the tree, the bigger it grows, the faster it spawns seeds, the happier you become.

Game play is highly addictive and is actually really fun.
the gist is easy to pick up (just like a penguin) so you don't have to be WTFPWN to get anywhere.
the game does have a speed curve like that of a train.
it starts off with lightning slow then gradually gets faster then before you know it, your still speeding up and then you go quickly.

The graphics.
I'm going to go ahead and say the graphics of this game are more effective than those of any PS3 game i have seen.
I'm not saying <, > or =. just more effective.
Mindsplittingly simple, yet i fell in love with them faster than i smashed the phone book on that huge spider.
I think they call it Character in 'relocation relocation', I'm just going to say it has a charm stronger than that of Pikachu.

Story
ummm.

requirements.
yeah, don't worry unless your computer comes from the 80s, in which case LOL @ U!

EVE: Online

Virtual life, it's a bitch.

EVE is one of those MMORPGs (muh-mor-pa-gh) games.
And it exploited my weakness. Space.
For as long as I can remember; I have been trying to move things using the force.
Mainly due to a childhood obsession with starwars but also because I thought space was so awesome.

So to the game.
It ain't free...
I think it's about £8:50 a month or something.
Best thing is to get the 21 day free trial.
If you ask me a 21 day free trial isn't enough to grasp the experience.

This game is made to reflect real life, meaning it has an economy, corporations and a history of slavery...
There are four factions: Amarr (old imperialist people who like baige), Caldari (corporate easy mode), Gallente (human rights campaigners) and minmatar (former slaves of the Amarr).
I chose Gallente thinking "oh great! this will have huge impact on the game!". Wrong.
due to learning books, you can fly any ship of any race as long as you have the time.
Caldari ships seem to be best balanced.

The skill idea. If you are going to get this game, make sure you do the learning skills first. learning skills make all the others go faster, so instead of having a week for a certain skill you'll have 2 days. The learning means that the younger your character the more shit you're going to be.

It's a good game, it really is, but that doesn't mean the people on it are nice. hell no!
I was lucky enough to meet these genuine safe guys. a week after joining their corp bla bla bla some people started war on us. we thought yeah fine that in game rules.
Then they pulled out my CEO's personal information and posted it where every one could see it. They also threatened his family. we thought, yeah fine we'll post a petition to CCP (the games developers) to which they did nothing.
This is just a warning, if your spouse or kids are playing this game, I recommend you check it out just to see what kind of stuff goes down.
my CEO is now thinking of taking legal charges against CCP of Internet crimes.

CCP aren't all bad though, they let you complain to them about how annoying some aspects of the game are. such as tremendous lag and random closure of the program.
Some one once said: "I want a girlfriend like EVE; they go down on you in the middle of the day without cause or explanation".

let me just tell you how huge this game is.
If we set up all the continents into Pangaea again, and set up a ship to fly across the map and had a race, you would win by over 80 days.
This game is for those who have A LOT of free time as with any MMORPG but i think EVE is pretty damn complicated, and if you don't have much free time or don't like complicated things then i suggest either homeworld or startrek.

'Flatout 2'

Do the bump and grind...


'Flatout 2', by Bugbear, is a nuts thrill ride that will leave you shaking in your seat!
It's the kind of game that would make your mum cry; unless, of course, your mum is a Texan.

Where to start...
Ah! The start line!
Every environment is nearly 100% destructible. That does include the start line and many, many, many walls. Sadly trees are not destructible and I was thrown out my front windscreen (literally) only to land; smack bang in the middle of the race course, then run down by five aggressive dicks.
You might think: "Hmmm... I can fuck up my surroundings... buuuut, wouldn't that mean the graphics would get tuned down a little?"
No. I can tell you: this game is 3 years old and I found the graphics to be amazing; not that I had much time to look at anything...

Laps in the race events are pointless.
They could have put a time limit of 10 seconds on and saw that got the furthest and it would make no difference, as the only bit of the race that matters is the end. Not to say the races are bad, but, as I found with Mario kart, you can be right at the end of a race and FUCK UP!

If racing 'aint yo' thing, Fear Not!
One of the reasons I remembered the title "Flatout" was because one night five years ago, I was at this guys house. We spent all night flinging a limp man out of a windscreen in an event called "high jump". Actually, we didn't spend all night doing that because we started to work out and do all sorts of manly things like breaking Rottweiler’s faces.
Any who, Thankfully Bugbear brought back the awesome events; such as: high jump, darts, ring of fire, baseball, and quite a few more.

Even if you just want to kill some bitches this game is for you!
As well as the events and racing, there is a "Derby" mode; or as I like to call it: "Death Arena".
This was a surprise for me actually!
I love it. Driving round and smashing directly into another car made out of paper (with the explosive tendencies of a nuclear bomb) is a real kick.
And for all those rim leachers, there's a time limit for not hitting cars. You have 45 seconds from each hit to get another BAFF!


The cars are well balanced and pretty much, you either have a strong one, a fast one, or one that turns well.
The Performance shop allows you to pimp your ride; so you can make it faster or stronger ect. The money system is also good, though I found myself thinking that I shouldn't have that much money, as I didn't realize that for every shunt or push you give someone you get paid!
WOOP!

Why?!
Why the hell did the sound man allow fall out boy to be on this game?
That's my one disappointment about this game: the music.
Yes, maybe if I was a Nascar loving guy wearing a white vest I would like it;
but being a skimpy boy in my room, I think hardcore drum and bass would beat Nickleback.
Underoath are good though, as is Rob Zombie.

Overall I think this game is aimed towards the young, spunky audience, like myself. Though I think any angry person could load this up and have a play; as long and they reconfigure the controls, otherwise you'll have no clue what's going on.
Thumbs up!

'Alien Shooter 2 Reloaded'

In a Word: splat.

In words:

How much fun can you have with game demos?
One hell of a lot!

This game has a tittle like 'Snakes on a Plane'; Does exactly as it says on the can.
Shooting hundreds of pixelated, four legged, martians kept me entertained for ages.

There are three game modes: Campaign, Survive and Gun Stand.
Now, I'm the kind of guy who likes to defend my base; so needless to say my favourite mode is 'Gun Stand' - a mode in which you fend of hoards of aliens...
With this mode though I sometimes felt like some old dear had asked me to paint the roads red in an interesting way.
Of course the turret is fully upgradable, with four differant options: extra turrets, grunts, chain gun or rockets.

Campaign: Wow. first level blew me away. It blew me away while I was blowing away many, many hundreds of invading bastards. The voice acting could do with improvement but it did the job alright. I was actually supprissed to find out that a game with this tittle actually had a story!

Survival: pretty much campaign but without the story. wonder round a field and shoot stuff. WOOP!

WHBBI: the graphics where a tad better. They aren't that great for 2007. But the game is only 600MB

I enjoyed the Demo for this and hopefully, soon I will be able to enjoy the whole game. All I need to wait for is that cheque to go through...

The Swan Princess

Sorry about the long gap, I have exams.

In a word: elegant.

In 236 words:

Two royal children are forced to get along when one year the prince asks the princess if they could wed. On hinting that there is no more to her than beauty she leaves and is stolen by a vengeful Ganon look-a-like, turned into a swan by day and get's shot at by said prince.


I'm not the biggest fan of Disney, as every story is pretty much the same, but they go about it in different ways...
I do like how they go about it though. Especially in this film.
seeing as there’s always one, lets start with the grumpy old one.
Today’s OAP is none other than Ganon (at least that’s what I call him), who can cast spells and shape-shift.

Our next contestant is young beautiful and gets turned into a swan. Yes, it’s Odette!

At first she seems to not get along with another of the competitors and then this is sealed when he cannot say there can be anything more to her than beauty.

Our buffoon of a prince is tricked time and again by the evil lord Ganon.

I have to say, the music is wicked! I love every song!

Not too sure the story line is too good though…

Not very ready salted…

I thought the ending was a bit dry.

WHBBI: The prince hauled on a green tunic and pulled out the master sword and slayed the evil Pig-man.

'Plants Vs Zombies'

In a word: original...

In 235 words:

I was zooming around playing G-mod when I got a little bored of shooting stupid combine in the face and thought I would check out steam's deals and new releases.
"A colourful garden; with zombies in it? What is this tom-foolery!
OH MY GOD! PLANTS SHOOTING ZOMBIES!"
Since Paypal is taking it's time setting up, I thought it would actually be a better idea if I got the trial just to see what it was like.
I have no shame in saying "I am a fan of peggle". I don't have any of the actual games but I had one hell of a lot of fun with the demo that came with 'The Orange Box'.
Playing both 'Peggle' and 'PVZ' ('Plants Vs Zombies') I realized that ‘Popcap Games’ have made their own style. A style that works whether you be shooting a very dramatic 'Bagatelle' or you be shottin' zombies.

The only time, I think, I've seen a plant shoot some one was back in '100,000,000 BC'.
This game is more original than ready salted!
Normally, it's the zombie eating stuff...
Not anymore. Today I saw an aubergine (eggplant) eat the undead.

I am now just raring for 'Paypal' the step their game up and set up my bloody account so I can get this game and also get 'Universe At War' for less than a fiver! Too bad the demo was only an hour…

Wrath of the Ninja

In a word: HE-YAA

In 236 words:

This film falls into the Stupid pointless category, meaning "Everything you have done has only helped the other side!". It happened in 'The supernaturalist', It happened in 'Star wars', it happened in 'Collateral Damage', and it pissed me off!

Story line: Three ninjas have to unite to defeat evil in an age of war.

It's a bit fuzzy. Especially for those that don't go by the Tensho calendar. I had no idea why anything was happening or when, all I knew is that people where dying - 'Gantz' style! The fuzziness is due to the fact that this film is a sliced, diced anime, pasted onto VCR

The music gave away the time the film was made; the 80's. Everything from this film reeks the 80's (Believe me, I've seen 'The Terminator'): The style of drawing, the music, the hair. The hair. Forget That Shit!

If I could relate this film to some video games - wait. I can (and will). 'Mortal Combat', 'Onimusha', 'Ninja Gaiden and 'House of the Dead 2'. Why house of the dead you cry! The voice acting. Could you be any more like a monotonal stone?!

So once again the story Annoyed me and the characterisation really annoyed me. at least make the blue flame guy do a rap; 'cos that's what he sounded like he was going to do!

WHHBI: they were proper ninjas and if the drawing was sharper.

'Casshern'

In a word: depressing.

In 2:20 words:

Come on! Did you have to make that film so sad?!

Some guy goes to war, dies, get's brought back to life by his dad, has to stop some other people - Created from the "Neo-cells" that are bent on killing humans.

I'm proud of myself as I didn't get that "What the hell is Osmosis fluid?" though my brain had turned to mush by the second hour. It is a long film, at 2:20 - no not two minutes and twenty seconds - two hours and twenty minutes.

It switches from horribly tear-jerking to epically epic the same speed as a sprinter changes legs.
I didn't cry, but oh so very nearly did.

Put in the oven for half an hour at 200 degrees. Oops, that’s dinner

At some point Tetsuya gains a pro suit of amour at which point i scribbled down "ROCOBOP!"
The music is powerful in fight scenes and soft in the sad parts. The editor for this film is flippin' awesome! Graphics are a big part of Casshern and I'll admit at the beginning I thought it was a bad move. Not at the end mate.
The costumes are amazing!

I thought the end was good but a bit weird.

WHBBI: I was watching it the second time round and if they explained the lightning.

http://www.veoh.com/browse/videos/category/action_adventure/watch/v17513895S7WBC6Jg

Let's fight together! Help save lives.

Many lives are effected by breast cancer. The fight against breast cancer should not only be up to the victims but it should be a fight for all humanity - female or male, it doesn't matter.
We all have to fight as hard as we can, whether we be back up/support or whether we, ourselves have the cancer.

Support the pink!

For daily posts with facts, poems and inspirational quotes about breast cancer Follow 'T
he Journey To Within Yourself' and comment the latest post saying you were refferred by me (unless you already follow or you weren't refferred by me).

I hope you raise millions!

Crank

In a word: non-stop

In 296 words:

"I'm looking for something beginning with an E."
"England?"

I went from seeing this blood-pumping swear box film to having tea and biscuits with my grandma.
I felt very anti-social!

Angry assassin gets injected with "Chinese shit" and needs to have adrenalin pumped into his blood to stay alive. If he doesn't he will die in less than an hour.

Chev must rampage, GTA style, through that city with Beverly Hills in it shouting insults down a phone that resemble a few of Caspa and Rusco's songs...
At one point give gives it up the back ally to his girlfriend in the middle of China town, which I found a bit strange, but it's all to keep alive remember...

Best line in the entire film: "There's a white nigga with a gun!" that is the height of LMAO.
The dialog mainly consists of: fuck, shit, mother fucker and various other swearwords that make me laugh. As you can probably tell this film has no smart. it is all action and booty. Non-the-less it's funkin’ awesome! No problems with the acting either.

I, myself though I would also have to keep my adrenalin up while watching this and didn't stop moving the while time. This feeling was helped by the furious music that was blasted into my ears. I want those songs!

I have still to meet some one that can receive head, drive a car and be shot at/chased all at the same time.
The editing style kind of fazed out half way through the film losing it's video game and slightly 80's style and going for the more wacky drug style and I liked the first style a lot more!

WHBBI: there was more jokes about Chav being English. But other than that it's enjoyable.

Gremlins 2: A new batch

In a Word: Hilarious.

In 354 words:

I have seen the first film. I saw it about a year and a half ago.
My favourite part was when the old lady got thrown out of her window by her stair lift.

When this film started I thought a stupid person had linked me to the wrong film, a Looney tunes film. Do not fear!

NEW YORK!
The old guy from the last film has moved shop to New York!
buuuuut, he dies and his shop gets taken over by some massive company who demolish it and take Gizmo (a weird furry creature called a Mogwai).
Gizmo is now in the crazy, animal testing part of the ridiculously high tech office block.
Soon saved by his friend from the fist film and is kept in a draw.

We are soon reminded of the rules of having a Mogwai: don't shine bright light on them, or they'll die - don't let them get wet - don't feed them after midnight.

So what happens next?
Water is sprayed on Gizmo and his spawn eat after midnight. Damn.
So now there are little green buggers running round wrecking the place.

So that's the film from then on.

I sit here munching on Hobnobs creams thinking: "what makes this film original?"
Well, there are a number of things. This film knows that it's a kind of crappy film and emphasizes it to the extreme.
This film couldn't scare my Nan but bloody hell it can make me crease.

There are a few varieties of Gremlin this time: Bat, Spider, smart, electric, transvestite and Rambo.

This film oozes with epic. With such deaths as: Concrete, shredder, headshot and mass electrocution. It's not really a film you have to pay attention to but if you don't you will seriously have a few wtf moments.

SOOO many references! The only way I can describe it is by saying this film is self aware. It knows it's a film and plays with it. Hulk Hogan turns up at one point. I have one funny memory of Hulk Hogan...

I prefered the first one. It had better music

Go watch now!

"Thtough the fire and BONK"

Any one who plays Team Fortress 2:

Through the fire and flames:

Ninja Terminator

In a word: Pointless

In 322 Words:
What the hell just happened?
An hour an a half ago I was laughing my balls off thinking I’d found some one that had actually thought "Hey, you know that film with the metal dude? Wouldn’t it be so much cooler if he was a ninja as well?", but no. I found some one that didn’t know what the hell they were doing.

The story:
Is lame.
Three reckless hoodies have a piece of, no joke, "The golden ninja warrior" which belongs to the "Ninja Empire" and they fight each other for some reason.
Completely unrelated: Some people with animal names kidnap each others girlfriends for a while and then fight. A lot.

Yeah that's about it.

Who the hell designed the costumes for this film? You made a ninja look like solid snake. And another portion of the cast look like the Chinese Monday blues.
What ninja wears bright orange?!

Everything in this film was pointless: The weird GRIM oral sex bit, the other sex bit, the crappy dialog, the whole thing.

The first half of the film was a laugh. True cheese. Half way through I must have had the biggest mood swing because i started getting angry with it...
It would be absolutely nuts with friends though!
Towards the end I found myself thinking a number of things.
What the hell is going on?
Why is solid snake having a sword fight with the Emperor?
I wish L/Ryusaki was there...
Who’s the bad guy again?

This film has also warped my mind making me think that every Chinese person:
Can do martial arts.
Flies 10 meters whenever hit in the head.
Also flips while flying.
This film also made me think ninjas:
Flip everywhere.
Can teleport.
Can shoot smoke out of their palms
Creep around each others houses all day
Are sword proof.

WHBBI: It actually had a cybernetic organism from the future and the people in it could act...

A very wonderful surprise. SQ at 'The road to here' has presented my little blog with Neno's Award. Thank you, SQ for the honor.


NENO'S AWARD

The award is:
1) a dedication for those who love blogging and love to encourage friendships through blogging.
2) to seek the reasons why we all love blogging.

I write this blog to help improve my writing and to quench my thirst for finding new knoledge and films.

The aims of this award:

1)As a dedication for those who love blogging and love to encourage friendships through blogging.
2)To seek the reasons why we all love blogging.
3)Put the award in one post as soon as you receive it.
4)Don't forget to mention the person who gives you the award.
5)Answer the award's question by writing the reason why you love blogging.
6)Tag and distribute the award to as many people as you like.
7)Don't forget to notify the award receivers and put their links in your post.

I also would like to pass on the award to the following blogs:
1. Justsoyouknow @ Can you earn extra income online
2. Creativestudent @ Guerrilla blogging
3. Lisa Langmead @ A modern housewifes hints and tips. (she seems to be away at the moment though...)

Review: of Robocop: Dark Justice/Meltdown/Ressurection/Crash and Burn

Can I just say: "Thank fuck that's over".

Links will be added tomorrow - maybe an adit aswell.

In a word: Lengthy

In 1,195 Words:

Robocop is, well, a cyborg police officer based in Detroit - which gave me a massive headache.

I'm going to treat these films as one, because as far as I can tell they are set (and filmed) in the same week. No, seriously, there is no sense of time at all.

We start off with a 'Starship troopers' style News cast highlighting the problem of a small group of suicide bombers (which I can’t remember the name of, something like Da Bomb) and who should turn up? YAY! ROCOBOP! Borocop shoots the bombers and is then taken out by a fat man in a stupid costume: "Bone Machine".

It is later discovered that Bonner machine has prototypes from the OCP (an equivalent to the Umbrella Corporation - but with robots). The OCP control almost everything. OCP are in financial collapse and One Sparking member, Damien, Has a plan which he describes as "Divine Intervention" (all I could think of was a priest with a gun). This idea was to have a giant super-computer control the entire city. A young, fresh employee of OCP (James Murphy) gets IMs telling him to meet at some loading bay at 8. he goes and there’s a secret thing going on.

It's here where a sense of time is needed. There is a flash back of before Coborop existed and he was Alex Murphy - working with John Cable. They were playing chess then John exposed himself to beat Alex and called it the "Cable Manoeuvre".

Later that day, they got a call to go check out a dog, which was eating human flesh.
After seeing what the dog was having a munch on they decided to check out the house and subsequently found a young woman in a chest-fridge and a man that takes John hostage.
The criminal Demands that Alex drop his gun while John tells him to shoot.
Alex drops the gun and is then told to "die" by the perpetrator and is somehow shoot dead my John.
John receives a medal and Alex looses respect for him.

Back to present tense. We now find out that that James Murphy is Pocobor's son. In this film; every one knows every one - and is related to them! So loads of stuff happens that is quite insignificant, then out of nowhere BOCOPOR GETS 1337 HACKZ and is told to "Terminate John Cable". Now, is it me or does that remind you of "Terminate John Connor"? Hmmm...
So, anyway, the roobcop chases John CABLE and then is confronted a second time with The Skeleton producer, who then takes John hostage. This time Alex shoots and kills John - with armour piercing bullets.

Film 2: OCP gets infiltrated by some women in leather hacking into S.A.I.N.T (the computer to control everything) and Porocob saves the day! Again! Woo!

You know I said John Died? Well he comes back as another Robocop. But for the simplicity I will just call them by their names and stop making up silly anagrams...

So John is told to go out and wreck shit up; thus framing Alex.
Alex is now to be recalled and doesn't know anything about it until he sees it on Federal network and a few police with guns come round the corner and shoot at him. He's then confronted by John and they have a fight which results in Alex driving into a river.

HERE COME THE HOMELESS NINJAS! ok, I’m sorry it's not really part of the film but it's on TV in the film... soo... well I found it funny.

Feeling rejected Alex tries to do the mega64 Resident evil 4 skit and dress in a large coat. he needs to get a processor for something.

As well as John after him, Alex now has the "robo-hunters" on his tail. The robo-hunters use powerful electric weapons to stop Robots.

Alex manages to Reclaim John from lies and they run away together.

The guy that came up with saint is fired for hiring the "Robo-hunters" and kills the entire Board using pressure and heat - Supplied by S.A.I.N.T.

Film 3:
Yeah Film 3 is just that Alex gets his memory back and John is captured and now controlled by an evil scientist called Dr. David Kaydick, who has invented the "Legion" virus - which can infect PCs and People. Dun dun dun! There is a lot of gun fighting and James finds out Robocop is his dad.

Also Damien becomes President of the OCP/a dickhead.

Film 4:
S.A.I.N.T is activated at midnight and Kaydick plans to infect the city with the Trojan Virus and every one has to stop him bla bla bla...
Every one gets into the Skynet building and it goes into lock down preventing escape.

Some fights take place and by now I’d forgotten nearly everything from the first film...

Kaydick successfully uploads the virus and there isn’t much they can do to stop it seeing as Alex is quite messed up.

Somehow every one apart from Kaydick and his ex wife get out of the main control room and are running from John, who catches up with them and turns Alex off.

Meanwhile, Kaydick and the wife are evaporating - woops sorry, pixelating and they both die without being able to set off the EMP to stop the ‘Red Queen’.

John stumbles up to the A.N.G.E.L computer and says "Do you play chess?", immediately I went OH CRAP! Then I think you can guess what happened after that.

The end was good (tone of unease invoice) but could have been a hell of a load better, like having a thumbs up. No, wait, that’s taken.


Films/Games i can connect this to: Judge Dredd, The Terminator, Irobot, Star Wars, Resident Evil, Any game that allows god made/Bullet proof made and Half-life.

This film is so much like Judge Dredd, I nearly shat myself with frustration. At one point I actually thought I was watching The damn thing. I kept expecting to hear: "I AM. THE LAW!" - I didn't though...

The Effects were alright. Apart from the scenery; Dreddful.

Acting was the usual (kind of) mediocre alrightness.

The sets where really quite good! Come to think of it, I didn’t realize they were sets.
WOAH!

The story = confused people. Who, in this film, wasn't a mum or dad?

The costumes were good apart from the Robo-hunters which looked like over eccentric paintballers and I swear one just had a master chief outfit on!

The TV in the film i thought was going to ask me if I wanted to "view more". There were two things on the TV i liked: The homeless ninjas and the OTOMO!

This Film had way to many likeness' to films. who puts a man called John and a woman called Sera in a film where theres a cyborg?

Over all: Don’t watch this all at once, like I did. I you do follow this guide: Have food, have water, have an icepack helmet, do it with a large screen in the dark, keep your finger on the volume control, Pay attention and last but not least watch it with a mate who is more eager to see it then you. If you can't be bothered to sit and watch for over 6 hours; watch Judge Dredd instead.

Review of film: MULAN

In a word: wonderful.

In 454 words:

It's been years since I last watched this. I'd forgotten how funny it was. Sometimes, though, Eddie Murphy gets on my nerves and steals the show a bit.

For those that haven't seen Mulan, It's set in China during the Sui dynasty (which means the time when China and the Mongols were at war - hence the great wall of China)

One man from every Family in Mulan's village is called up, and being the only man in the family, Mulan's father steps up to the honour. Opposing to this "honour", and previously disgracing her family name, Mulan decides to Take the draft paper and pose as a man in the army. Woops.

Knowing Mulan has escaped to the country The Ancestors send the great stone dragon after her but a small red dragon named Mushu accidentally breaks it, so he goes in its place.

Thinking it would be a good idea, Mushu teaches (unsuccessfully) Mulan how to act like a man which result in enemies...

Upon failing so much Mulan gets thrown out of the army mid-song, but proves herself worthy by climbing the top of a large pole and fetching (so kindly) her dashing commander’s arrow.

No and expects her to be a man until She is wounded while taking down the whole Hun army simultaneously saving her commander. She is spared because she saved the commander.

There is a large celebration yet, Shock and horror - some of the Huns aren't dead! And then it's the climactic ending.

AHG! Tay Zonday is depressing me!

So, you got the essentials; good story, good voice acting, good animation.

It's great for kids. I loved it and about ten or so years later, i still love it. It has the charm which settles you down for some good laughs. The music is a way to illustrate tehe situation to children which it does very well. The only thing with the singing is that captain le Shang's singing voice is Donny Osmond...

The signing up scene reminded me so much of some of the sound clips in Red Alert 3 with all the emperor and honour...

The best bit by far is the "Man bit". i was laughing for a solid five minutes, at least. For some reason women trying to act like men is quite funny because (and I don't know why) they always try to complicated... either that or just burp and fart.

Lots of wisdom and wise words are bound to fill your head after watching this film.

I would say, if you don’t like war or Chinese people and prefer Football (English football) and Americans you should watch 'She's the man' - it's pretty much the same thing. WATCH MULAN NOW!

Review of film: 100 million BC

In a Word: Laughable.

In 446 words:

Oh dear. Ken Locsmandi deserves a slap.
Now, see when I clicked on the link to this I thought I was getting the film with the guy from 'the mummy' in it, wrong film.

While watching this shameful film I felt as though I was watching an 85 minute long Red alert 2 cut scene - with dinosaurs. The graphics were so bloody bad! Get your proportions right! I’m no longer a large fan of dinosaurs but I know that wasn't called a "fillagolopinawhoowa" (ok they didn't call it that, but something equally ridiculous) it was either: T-rex or Giganotosaurus, neither of which lived 100 million years ago. trust me I know this because I’m awesome...

A man, in the 1950s, sent his brother and friends back in time to a long time ago (not quite a galaxy far, far away) to the time when giant lizards ruled the earth. The team’s time device broke so they were stranded in the past. The crew leave cave paintings as messages to Frank, the man who sent them.

Frank feels bad so he waits 60 years and then goes to save them. This is one of those "you're the best we have" films. So, the best they have is sent with frank to save the previous crew of 20. Now. Remember there are dinosaurs and time travel. There’s the story. Simple.

"The best they have" go through the worm-hole and all are fine apart from one guy, who got embedded into a tree upon entry. Believe when I say (where ever you go I’m gonna be there) Half of "the best" get taken out by two raptors and one gets his face shot off by a plant. I was disappointed. Seriously, you know you’re on low pay when your face gets shot off by a plant.

Anyway... they find the three people, who've now been there for 6 years.
they go back, frank has to stay behind to close the worm-hole, gets eaten instead, Hench Giganotosaurus gets through the hole and terrorises the modern whole. The city I can only describe as "The place from GTA: San Andreas" but with worse graphics.

So there you have it, a crap film with a crap ending and crap face acting. Face acting (as I put it) is expressions; the brother in this film had the "OH SHI-" face on all the time!

a few more nit-picks which don’t require detail: Why is every one driving the same hummer? Why don't you just shoot the damn thing in the eye? Wouldn’t that kill you like in 'Time cop'? What the fuck is that fucking beeping noise? You're not 'The Lost World'

Rant Blog.

Is now up. Trust me i just had the fifth worst night ever. it's now 12 and i've been doing music coursework for about 4 hours and still shit.

www.emyrant.blogspot.com

theres nothing on it yet but tomorrow there will be! you can count on it.

Hey! Thanks again to all the followers!

Well, I just want to say I got it wrong in my last post!
Art ist won the compitition! It just didn't get entered by email.

Just a quick question, do you guys think I should start a new blog for rants?
I have quite alot on my chest and I feel like letting it off to some random people I don't know! Some of the rants may be personal and about people but they will also be about public transport, "wiff waff" (maybe) and other things that annoy me.