Minecraft

Minecraft is a Java based RPG/world creator/sandbox that will have your jaw hanging limply below your kneecaps.

There's a few modes but i'm going to focus on the main mode which is minecraft: Alpha, which yes, is still in Alpha.

For a game that's around a year old and is written in java, i'm

surprised I didn't year about it earlier.

Well the basic jist of the game is that you start a new game and the program generates a random map which you're then thrown unforgivingly into.

You have a few game hours to make a shelter and to get something to do during the night, unless you want to die while trying to slay one of four beasts of the land.

Spiders, skeletons, Zombies and creepers are all trying to stop you from perfecting the infinite landscape. you must mine for invaluable resources such as iron, coal and diamond, so that you can rid of these monsters and create a paradise. That is of course unless you play in peaceful

mode, where your health regenerates and there are no nasty monsters.

In addition to monsters there are four regular animals which you can farm for health giving products and other useful things; Cows, chickens, sheep and pigs are all part of the unforgiving yet,

beautiful landscape.

This games has neither the best graphics nor the best physics engine (actually it doesn't even have an engine) but it works well and has a fully supportive

community and an awesomely talented Coder behind it which quite honestly means the possibilities for this game are endless.

As far as the story goes, you can just make it up and as far as character design goes, well hell, you can make that up too. it take a bit of working out but in the end is worth it.

I still haven't mentioned the truly unique aspect of this game. Everything is made out of blocks which you can pick up and craft, smelt, place or just smash. The whole world it a mesh which you

can modify to your hearts content. obviously spawning from this a huge penis and breast structures, or maybe something more sophisticated like super mario?

Well this is a game you can really let your imagination run riot, which a mob full of people holding flaming touches.

For nine euro I would definitely recommend getting this. It's not quite done yet thought so

there's many more things to be added. You can play it in browser or you can download the game to your hard drive, but it only take a few kb (one of the plus sides for using java) so I would download if you can.

Gears of war two and Mass effect 2 comparison.

well, I've just got a hold of 'Gears of war 2' for the Xbox 360 and it struck me that it's kind of similar to mass effect, here's the run down:

'Gears of war 2' is a game made by Epic games and stars a rather butch crew in a 3rd person shooter.

not played the first gears but i'm guessing that the collectors zerg scrin locust came up from the ground and blew some shit up.

well the colour palette is pretty much every shade of brown.

The only problems with games like this is that combat is never surprising at all the combat zones are filled with knee high walls and pillars.

as you might be able to tell the game play is manly duck and shoot, sometimes run somewhere.

it's pretty fun though, not going to lie.

'Mass effect 2' is a game made by Bioware and stars a rather talkative crew in a 3rd person RPG.

not played the first gears but i'm guessing that the collectors zerg scrin locustcome down from space and steal colonies.

well the colour palette is pretty much every shade of grey.

The only problems with games like this is that combat is never surprising at all the combat zones are filled with knee high walls and pillars.

as you might be able to tell the game play is mainly run somewhere sometimes duck and shoot.

This game is huge, with loads of different options at almost every point in the game, this makes the game have a high replay value.

The games are pretty similar as they both have weird looking alienistic bad guys that you have to shoot from behind low walls with regenerating health, but I'm going to go ahead and say I liked 'Mass effect 2' more.

Dyson.

pro space gardening!

It's not out yet but I Beta like the cool guy I am!

October the ninth, a day that will leave many starved, a day that no one will sleep, a day that every one will be playing Dyson.

Dyson is a fresh new 'Indie' (independent) game that has the rule of 'give a little, gain a lot'.

Pretty much you get these seed things that I like to call clangers, because they clang, and an asteroid belt.
The aim of the gaim is to take over the asteroid belt in a fury of Clangs.

So you start each level with a tree on an asteroid and some seeds.
The longer you have the tree, the bigger it grows, the faster it spawns seeds, the happier you become.

Game play is highly addictive and is actually really fun.
the gist is easy to pick up (just like a penguin) so you don't have to be WTFPWN to get anywhere.
the game does have a speed curve like that of a train.
it starts off with lightning slow then gradually gets faster then before you know it, your still speeding up and then you go quickly.

The graphics.
I'm going to go ahead and say the graphics of this game are more effective than those of any PS3 game i have seen.
I'm not saying <, > or =. just more effective.
Mindsplittingly simple, yet i fell in love with them faster than i smashed the phone book on that huge spider.
I think they call it Character in 'relocation relocation', I'm just going to say it has a charm stronger than that of Pikachu.

Story
ummm.

requirements.
yeah, don't worry unless your computer comes from the 80s, in which case LOL @ U!

EVE: Online

Virtual life, it's a bitch.

EVE is one of those MMORPGs (muh-mor-pa-gh) games.
And it exploited my weakness. Space.
For as long as I can remember; I have been trying to move things using the force.
Mainly due to a childhood obsession with starwars but also because I thought space was so awesome.

So to the game.
It ain't free...
I think it's about £8:50 a month or something.
Best thing is to get the 21 day free trial.
If you ask me a 21 day free trial isn't enough to grasp the experience.

This game is made to reflect real life, meaning it has an economy, corporations and a history of slavery...
There are four factions: Amarr (old imperialist people who like baige), Caldari (corporate easy mode), Gallente (human rights campaigners) and minmatar (former slaves of the Amarr).
I chose Gallente thinking "oh great! this will have huge impact on the game!". Wrong.
due to learning books, you can fly any ship of any race as long as you have the time.
Caldari ships seem to be best balanced.

The skill idea. If you are going to get this game, make sure you do the learning skills first. learning skills make all the others go faster, so instead of having a week for a certain skill you'll have 2 days. The learning means that the younger your character the more shit you're going to be.

It's a good game, it really is, but that doesn't mean the people on it are nice. hell no!
I was lucky enough to meet these genuine safe guys. a week after joining their corp bla bla bla some people started war on us. we thought yeah fine that in game rules.
Then they pulled out my CEO's personal information and posted it where every one could see it. They also threatened his family. we thought, yeah fine we'll post a petition to CCP (the games developers) to which they did nothing.
This is just a warning, if your spouse or kids are playing this game, I recommend you check it out just to see what kind of stuff goes down.
my CEO is now thinking of taking legal charges against CCP of Internet crimes.

CCP aren't all bad though, they let you complain to them about how annoying some aspects of the game are. such as tremendous lag and random closure of the program.
Some one once said: "I want a girlfriend like EVE; they go down on you in the middle of the day without cause or explanation".

let me just tell you how huge this game is.
If we set up all the continents into Pangaea again, and set up a ship to fly across the map and had a race, you would win by over 80 days.
This game is for those who have A LOT of free time as with any MMORPG but i think EVE is pretty damn complicated, and if you don't have much free time or don't like complicated things then i suggest either homeworld or startrek.

'Flatout 2'

Do the bump and grind...


'Flatout 2', by Bugbear, is a nuts thrill ride that will leave you shaking in your seat!
It's the kind of game that would make your mum cry; unless, of course, your mum is a Texan.

Where to start...
Ah! The start line!
Every environment is nearly 100% destructible. That does include the start line and many, many, many walls. Sadly trees are not destructible and I was thrown out my front windscreen (literally) only to land; smack bang in the middle of the race course, then run down by five aggressive dicks.
You might think: "Hmmm... I can fuck up my surroundings... buuuut, wouldn't that mean the graphics would get tuned down a little?"
No. I can tell you: this game is 3 years old and I found the graphics to be amazing; not that I had much time to look at anything...

Laps in the race events are pointless.
They could have put a time limit of 10 seconds on and saw that got the furthest and it would make no difference, as the only bit of the race that matters is the end. Not to say the races are bad, but, as I found with Mario kart, you can be right at the end of a race and FUCK UP!

If racing 'aint yo' thing, Fear Not!
One of the reasons I remembered the title "Flatout" was because one night five years ago, I was at this guys house. We spent all night flinging a limp man out of a windscreen in an event called "high jump". Actually, we didn't spend all night doing that because we started to work out and do all sorts of manly things like breaking Rottweiler’s faces.
Any who, Thankfully Bugbear brought back the awesome events; such as: high jump, darts, ring of fire, baseball, and quite a few more.

Even if you just want to kill some bitches this game is for you!
As well as the events and racing, there is a "Derby" mode; or as I like to call it: "Death Arena".
This was a surprise for me actually!
I love it. Driving round and smashing directly into another car made out of paper (with the explosive tendencies of a nuclear bomb) is a real kick.
And for all those rim leachers, there's a time limit for not hitting cars. You have 45 seconds from each hit to get another BAFF!


The cars are well balanced and pretty much, you either have a strong one, a fast one, or one that turns well.
The Performance shop allows you to pimp your ride; so you can make it faster or stronger ect. The money system is also good, though I found myself thinking that I shouldn't have that much money, as I didn't realize that for every shunt or push you give someone you get paid!
WOOP!

Why?!
Why the hell did the sound man allow fall out boy to be on this game?
That's my one disappointment about this game: the music.
Yes, maybe if I was a Nascar loving guy wearing a white vest I would like it;
but being a skimpy boy in my room, I think hardcore drum and bass would beat Nickleback.
Underoath are good though, as is Rob Zombie.

Overall I think this game is aimed towards the young, spunky audience, like myself. Though I think any angry person could load this up and have a play; as long and they reconfigure the controls, otherwise you'll have no clue what's going on.
Thumbs up!

'Alien Shooter 2 Reloaded'

In a Word: splat.

In words:

How much fun can you have with game demos?
One hell of a lot!

This game has a tittle like 'Snakes on a Plane'; Does exactly as it says on the can.
Shooting hundreds of pixelated, four legged, martians kept me entertained for ages.

There are three game modes: Campaign, Survive and Gun Stand.
Now, I'm the kind of guy who likes to defend my base; so needless to say my favourite mode is 'Gun Stand' - a mode in which you fend of hoards of aliens...
With this mode though I sometimes felt like some old dear had asked me to paint the roads red in an interesting way.
Of course the turret is fully upgradable, with four differant options: extra turrets, grunts, chain gun or rockets.

Campaign: Wow. first level blew me away. It blew me away while I was blowing away many, many hundreds of invading bastards. The voice acting could do with improvement but it did the job alright. I was actually supprissed to find out that a game with this tittle actually had a story!

Survival: pretty much campaign but without the story. wonder round a field and shoot stuff. WOOP!

WHBBI: the graphics where a tad better. They aren't that great for 2007. But the game is only 600MB

I enjoyed the Demo for this and hopefully, soon I will be able to enjoy the whole game. All I need to wait for is that cheque to go through...

The Swan Princess

Sorry about the long gap, I have exams.

In a word: elegant.

In 236 words:

Two royal children are forced to get along when one year the prince asks the princess if they could wed. On hinting that there is no more to her than beauty she leaves and is stolen by a vengeful Ganon look-a-like, turned into a swan by day and get's shot at by said prince.


I'm not the biggest fan of Disney, as every story is pretty much the same, but they go about it in different ways...
I do like how they go about it though. Especially in this film.
seeing as there’s always one, lets start with the grumpy old one.
Today’s OAP is none other than Ganon (at least that’s what I call him), who can cast spells and shape-shift.

Our next contestant is young beautiful and gets turned into a swan. Yes, it’s Odette!

At first she seems to not get along with another of the competitors and then this is sealed when he cannot say there can be anything more to her than beauty.

Our buffoon of a prince is tricked time and again by the evil lord Ganon.

I have to say, the music is wicked! I love every song!

Not too sure the story line is too good though…

Not very ready salted…

I thought the ending was a bit dry.

WHBBI: The prince hauled on a green tunic and pulled out the master sword and slayed the evil Pig-man.