Review of film: 100 million BC

In a Word: Laughable.

In 446 words:

Oh dear. Ken Locsmandi deserves a slap.
Now, see when I clicked on the link to this I thought I was getting the film with the guy from 'the mummy' in it, wrong film.

While watching this shameful film I felt as though I was watching an 85 minute long Red alert 2 cut scene - with dinosaurs. The graphics were so bloody bad! Get your proportions right! I’m no longer a large fan of dinosaurs but I know that wasn't called a "fillagolopinawhoowa" (ok they didn't call it that, but something equally ridiculous) it was either: T-rex or Giganotosaurus, neither of which lived 100 million years ago. trust me I know this because I’m awesome...

A man, in the 1950s, sent his brother and friends back in time to a long time ago (not quite a galaxy far, far away) to the time when giant lizards ruled the earth. The team’s time device broke so they were stranded in the past. The crew leave cave paintings as messages to Frank, the man who sent them.

Frank feels bad so he waits 60 years and then goes to save them. This is one of those "you're the best we have" films. So, the best they have is sent with frank to save the previous crew of 20. Now. Remember there are dinosaurs and time travel. There’s the story. Simple.

"The best they have" go through the worm-hole and all are fine apart from one guy, who got embedded into a tree upon entry. Believe when I say (where ever you go I’m gonna be there) Half of "the best" get taken out by two raptors and one gets his face shot off by a plant. I was disappointed. Seriously, you know you’re on low pay when your face gets shot off by a plant.

Anyway... they find the three people, who've now been there for 6 years.
they go back, frank has to stay behind to close the worm-hole, gets eaten instead, Hench Giganotosaurus gets through the hole and terrorises the modern whole. The city I can only describe as "The place from GTA: San Andreas" but with worse graphics.

So there you have it, a crap film with a crap ending and crap face acting. Face acting (as I put it) is expressions; the brother in this film had the "OH SHI-" face on all the time!

a few more nit-picks which don’t require detail: Why is every one driving the same hummer? Why don't you just shoot the damn thing in the eye? Wouldn’t that kill you like in 'Time cop'? What the fuck is that fucking beeping noise? You're not 'The Lost World'